I am truly grateful for what I have each and every day. I know just how lucky I am with every fiber in me, I am so thankful for all of my blessings but despite that I usually go to bed thinking about just how big a mess I have made of things. I always feel that I just am not quite getting things right. No forget that, I pretty much think I am sucking at everything right now. There is so much to squeeze into each an every moment, that it seems like it never quite comes out how I would hope. My feet hit the ground running and I barely stop yet sometimes I think I am simply just spinning my wheels. Then I am blessed with today, just a regular Thursday  that filled my heart and restarted my soul. The baby woke up happy, full of cuddles and I kept thinking, "this is why people are "morning people" because if I wake up to this how could anything be bad." Then the 4-yr old joined us and I watched as the baby was so overjoyed to see her that she couldn't pull my hand fast enough to walk over to her. They love being together, and I am so lucky that the big sisters take such good care of the little one. They are her protectors and her safety net when I cannot be and she absolutely adores them. We waited for the biggest sis to get up and I thought I heard some rumblings from her room. Middle sis heard too and finally wanted to see what she was up to and when we walked in the bedroom she proudly announced she had gotten up and made both she and her sister's bed, laid out their clothes and put toothpaste on her toothbrush. These may seem like menial daily tasks but to me they meant so much more. Her sweet little mind thought of someone else before herself and from the moment she woke up she wanted to help her sister. I couldn't have been more proud. It means volumes to me when I see my kids, despite what they have been through find that good in themselves and when they act on it, it helps me feel like something is going right with them. The rest of the morning was just as great, I spent it running errands with little ones and we enjoyed lunch together, and for the 1st time in a while I really got to listen to what my child was saying, no interruptions and no distractions and I remembered just how much I love hearing how her little mind works. The girls had a play date after school and when I asked them to clean up their room, they did it. I mean really did it, totally clean and put away! Miracle in itself! And when I got to the gym we found out the daycare was full so after a change of plans we ended up at the park. It was a beautiful night and we ran on the grass and did handstands and pushed each other so high on the swings that the girls though they were touching the sky. The bigger girls took countless turns sliding down with the baby who would squeal with delight each time and squirm to get back around to them. We ran and we laughed and for the first time in a long time it didn't feel incomplete or broken anymore. We just felt okay and that felt really good. Not thinking about anything other than that moment right then and it was enough. I was blessed with this day so that I could see that the efforts I am making now have pay-offs, the lessons are being learned, the effort is being rewarded little by little. Our scripture story was about Jesus blessing the children and I couldn't help but think that was also not a coincidence, I was being reminded about how truly lucky I am to have them as an example to me, for they are truly the pure in heart. I think heaven opened up just a little bit so I could get the glimpse of what may come, and it was enough to keep us going for a little while. Today was a good day, tomorrow probably won't be, but this is not a race that will be won in the sprint, but I know we are at least headed in the right direction.